“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.” VF
I have been engaged in discussion with others about the joys and sorrows this time of year. As we discuss the challenges of accepting some things the way they are, and being able to find joy in our lives, I reflect on the support of having a mindfulness practice in my life. The end of the year can bring joyful reflection and anticipation as well as sorrowful reflection of loss and difficulty. Having a mindfulness practice during these seasons allows me to accept the joys that are present while allowing space for the challenges. This approach to life is an attitude. Practicing attitudes of acceptance and letting go serves us well by helping to find balance or equal attention to joys and sorrows. They require us to practice “and/both” language and attitude.
In MBSR, we teach and practice the attitudes of acceptance and letting go. For me, the Viktor Frankl quote speaks volumes. Today I’m providing a brief description of these MBSR attitudes. Acceptance is about seeing things as they really are in the present. When we accept things as they are, we aren’t required to like everything or take a passive attitude toward everything. Rather, when we can acknowledge and accept things as they are in the present, we are no longer resisting. When we step back from resisting/forcing, we can begin any healing, resourcing and/or problem solving that might serve us well. Letting go is that ability to maintain even-mindedness and emotional regulation, even in the face of adversity or strong reactivity. When we give up trying to make things be a certain way, we open opportunities for curiosity and additional options. We decrease reactivity and gain a more caring attitude and mindful awareness. And yes, for most of us, this is an ongoing, day to day practice! The good news is that these are skills that can be strengthened.
Researchers of Mindfulness and Positive Psychology have named equanimity as an important psychological element in the improvement of well-being (see article links below). Equanimity is an even minded state that accepts that there is a balance and flow of pleasant, unpleasant, and neutral experiences, objects, and events in one’s life. Equanimity occurs when we practice the attitudes of acceptance and letting go.
Consider RSVPing to the Monthly Mindfulness gathering in January to engage in practice with these attitudes. May you find a balance of joys, sorrows, acceptance and letting go at this time of the year,
Karen
Meditation Practice for Acceptance/Letting Go:
Finding balance in the news:
For a deeper dive into aspects of equanimity:
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